TAG | sleep rituals
Dear Carol,
My son is 8 yrs. old. He has been sleep walking and talking for several years. He started when he was about 2yrs. old. It has gradually gotten worse. He cries most of the time when he is doing this. He talks about crazy things not necessarily scary stuff but sometimes he is very terrified. He normally has actions with his speech. I don’t know what to do for him. I used to be able to wake him up when he is doing this, but anymore He won’t wake up, He does not remember a bit of it the next morning. I have heard not wake up sleep walkers. Is this true? Is this something I need to talk with his doctor about? If you could suggest something that would be great.
Thank You
Mom of a Sleepwalker
Dear Mom,
Sleep walking is fairly common, in fact I do it myself from time to time! Research has said that up to 15% of kids are sleepwalkers. Some do it more when they are sick, have a fever, are overtired, or are stressed about something. It sounds like your son has an extreme case of it and I would recommend a trip to the Doctor’s just to make sure it isn’t anything more serious.
In the meantime, there are a few things you can do that might help. Create a soothing bedtime ritual that helps him calm down. This could include soft music, soft light, singing quiet songs, etc. Just make sure you aren’t doing things to energize him (like tickling, wrestling, etc). Once you create a ritual, stick to it as well as a regular bedtime. The more you fluctuate his bedtime, the more you interrupt his sleep cycles. For me, I have to have a small light (nightlight) on in my room. I have found for myself that I sleepwalk more when it is pitch black. You may want to experiment with things like this to see what works best for you son. Sometimes doctors also recommend waking your son up on a regular schedule, at the same time every night to change his sleep routine.
When you find him sleepwalking, don’t freak out, just know he is still sleeping and dreaming. Don’t worry if you can’t wake him up, just steer him back to bed. I don’t think it is harmful if you do wake him up, but he may be more startled and confused, so just expect that. It may be a good idea to keep the floor of his room clean and the hallway, etc., so when he does wander around he doesn’t hurt himself. If you have stairs that he could go down, get a gate to keep him from falling down the stairs. Also, if he is spending the night at anyone’s home, you need to warn them of his sleepwalking so they are prepared for middle of the night action.
As for his crying and being terrified, you might spend some time exploring what he is afraid of when he is awake. You may also want to monitor how many scary movies and violent television or video games he is exposed to. Typically the sleepwalker is dreaming while they are walking/doing things and dreams are influenced by what is in our brain. Things may not seem scary when we are awake, but your brain has a way of mixing things up and creating new scenarios when we are sleeping that can be really frightening.
Hope this helps and I hope you can get a full night’s sleep!
Carol Agnew, MA, LMFT
Online Counselor
http://www.asktheinternettherapist.com/online_counselor_ag.asp
